Three Weeks In.

I know it's been ten days since I've posted anything, but life has been busy.

So this past Wednesday I played in my first PGA Tour Pro-Am. Granted, I'm not that good a golfer. I usually shoot in the mid to high 90's. So going out and playing with a pro, and having a gallery of people watching me was quite nerve racking. The pro was alright. He would talk to you if you talked to him, but never went out of his way to chat it up with you. His caddie was great. Very chatty and originally from my hometown, so we had some things to talk about. Anyway, had a great smoke free time. It was pretty nerve racking, but I didn't want to smoke at all.

Work has been a little more stressful lately. We have a group of folks performing poorly, and they are looking to lay blame elsewhere so they are taking shots at my department. We have a meeting coming up this Monday with all parties, so we'll see what happens. I can certainly lob some grenades back over the wall if I have to.

So I didn't want to post anything in the blog about what I've been doing with my medication, but I'm going to anyway. When I originally got the prescription, the doctor told me because I wasn't a heavy smoker that I might feel more sick than if I was a pack+ a day smoker. I didn't feel sick really, so I kept downing two a day. At some point, I forgot to take my medication twice a day, for two days in a row but I still didn't have any cravings. I figured, let me try to save a little money and just take one a day. Well, it's working. I've been taking 1mg a day for two weeks and I still have no cravings. Let me also say, I don't recommend anyone try this at home. Just because it works for me doesn't mean it's going to work for you. Good luck everyone. Just a couple days away from my one month anniversary.

Tim

Day 13.

It's been a few days since my last post, but I'm happy to report everything is going A-O-K.

In even better news, I had a few cocktails on Friday evening. Sure, I certainly had the urge to smoke, but I did not. Marlboro lights were available as well, as the couple that came over were smokers.

On Saturday I had a golf tournament where I knocked down a few beers, and didn't smoke. More powerful urges on Saturday, but still no smoking.

So here is smoke more good news for me :

After 2 weeks:
Blood flow improves; nicotine has passed from your body.

Within 2 weeks to 3 months:
Circulation will improve, making walking and running easier; lung functioning increases up to 30%.

Later..

One week and counting.

This is too easy. ;-)

Just kidding! I have tried to quit cold turkey at least three of four times. I tried the gum without much success. This is by far the easiest quit I've had. I'm now telling my smoking friends they need to try this medicine if they really want to quit. My insurance isn't covering it, but I did the math and right now at $122 a month I'm breaking even by not buying cigarettes, so I'm fine with it.

The NFL season starts tonight. How exciting is that? Football is by far my favorite sport. It's something I look forward to every year. Summer used to be my favorite season of the year, but now fall is my favorite season, because of football.

Problem is the first game is tonight but I have for the first time, watched Big Brother obsessively since it began. What to do? I'll have to DVR one of them I guess. I think I got hooked on Big Brother because of the whole Showtime thing. Even though it can be boring as hell, it's still pretty cool.

Enough for now.. later..

Keep on keeping on.

Don't have much to talk about today. Same as yesterday. No real urges. I did have Chinese food for lunch. That can be a test, but to be honest I didn't even think about it. So Day 6, and this is what I'm told.

-Your sense of taste and smell will improve.

-You will feel and sleep better and your breath, clothes and hair
will smell fresher.

I haven't really noticed the taste or smell thing. I'll have to ask my wife about the smelling better part. I'm sure I smelled like a smoker before, but I couldn't tell. I am getting sick of the coughing and phlegm thing. I'm told that takes two months.

I love short work weeks!

Day Five.

I'm wrapping up day five as we speak.

All in all, the weekend went pretty good. I didn't have any drinks, so that went well but I did play golf, which is a trigger. I had some cravings for sure, but nothing overpowering. I think if you asked my wife, I was definitely a little more irritable than normal but that is to be expected right?

This Chantix GetQuit website is a joke. I signed up, and I get these emails with "tips" to print out so I can read them throughout my day. Are they serious? They really don't think their website is going to help me stop smoking? Only one thing is going to get me to stop smoking, and that is self motivation. Of course their medicine sure is helping with that too, but not so sure about the web site.

So back to work tomorrow. I'm actually looking forward to it. I think it helps me not to think about smoking. My buddy is now on day 3, so we're neck and neck. We've got a little bet going on the side as well. Have a good week everyone!

Day Two (Again)

Well, I'm still on track, and still no urges to smoke. I think I'll do pretty good this weekend, just because there will be plenty of stuff to do. My smoking buddy has been on Chantix for a week now as well, and he quits tomorrow. It's going to help that we are both quitting together. I gotta say he's been pretty supportive. Not offering me cigarettes even though he still smoked. Looking forward to the long weekend. Hopefully get a couple rounds of golf in.

Where is my self control?!!??

Dear God.

My old boss was in town last night. Haven't seen him in months. Of course he's a smoker. Of course we go out for dinner and drinks and a few more drinks. I was worried about this one. Especially so close to quitting. Of course I had a couple smokes with my boss. Of course I felt awful about it later on. I do love this medicine though. I felt nothing from the cigarettes, and actually, they tasted bad to me.

So it sucks, and here I am AGAIN, restarting. My carbon monoxide level must be up again in my blood!

What did I learn? I'm not having any alcoholic beverages for at least a couple weeks. Maybe a month. Not a big deal, I'm not the kind of guy that needs to drink everyday, or even every week for that matter.

The guilt trip I'm sending myself on is worse than the smoking! It's ridiculous that I keep going back to the old habit. I don't even want one. The cravings are flat out, not there. I'll step it up this weekend. Spending it with the family at the cottage, so watching my two kids run around will certainly make me not want to smoke.

Day Two.

I actually cannot believe how great I feel. I had no urges whatsoever this morning. I haven't even thought of wanting a smoke. I actually think smoking that cigarette yesterday was a help, because it showed me that I got no enjoyment out of smoking while on Chantix.

So my oxygen level and carbon monoxide level have returned to normal in my blood, and my chance of heart attack has decreased! At least that's what the old world wide web tells me.

Day Two minus One.

So yesterday ended up pretty well. I was tired from nicotine deprivation, and I fell asleep on the couch at 9:30. I usually go to bed about 11:30, so big difference.

I get up this morning, no real big cravings. I grab my wallet from on top of the fridge, and staring me in the face is a pack of Marlb Lights with probably six smokes left. I picked them up, then threw them back down. Finished getting ready for work, went to walk out the door and stopped. I went back grabbed a smoke, and got in the car.

So I lit it up, and smoked the whole damned thing on the way to work. Funny thing is, I didn't get the rush I was expecting. I was hoping for that killer buzz you get after laying off nicotine for a day. It actually pissed me off! I guess this medicine works after all!

Then the guilt started in. Why the f*** did I smoke that? I didn't get any enjoyment out of it whatsoever. So now I've just restarted the process as of about 7:45AM. Whatever. I'm smoke free again, and I've told my wife to make those cigarettes on the fridge disappear. I had to try one, and it sucked, so off we go.

..and thanks for the comments folks. I was honestly blogging this for myself, but glad you found it. None of my family or friends know about this blog. It doesn't bother me if they find it, but I'm not going out of my way to tell them about it. Thank you all for your kind words and support. I'll venture around and look at your blogs too.

Day One (+6) - Crush the Pack Day!

So I've been downing Chantix for a week. I was able to see it work. I noticed I didn't need to run out the door this weekend to have a smoke the first thing after I got up. That is usually what I do.

Yesterday, well this morning, was my last day as a smoker. I smoked my ass off too. Not that I needed the smoke, but that it was my last day so I was going to puff as much as possible!

So far so good today, it's 3PM and really the only issue I'm having is an overwhelming feeling of being tired. Like tired to the point I want to shut the office door and put my head down. The C has taken the edge of the cravings. If I just don't think about it, it goes away. I mean, if I wanted a cig my smoking buddy downstairs would love for me to join him.

So far so good..

Keep on keepin' on.

Day One.

Took my first pill this morning.

Chantix. I know several people this has worked for, so I'm giving it a try. A week from now, I'll be done smoking!

I've read about some of the side effects, wierd dreams, trouble sleeping, so we'll see. Right now I'm freaking exhausted. Long weekend, and early morning this morning due to the kids.

It's time.

My kids are almost 3 and 1. They deserve it. My wife deserves it just as much. She has had to put up with me smelling like smoke for 11 years .

I've smoked for 13 years, but I want to be around to see my kids graduate High School.

It's time.